CHiPs (2017)

            So about a week ago, I went to a preview screening of “Chips,” based on the 70’s tv show, and it starred Michael Pena and Dax Shepard. I never saw the show, nor did I even know it was based on a show until I saw it in the credits, so again, I’m looking at this based on a movie.

            In this action-comedy, we follow a former BMX stuntman trying to fix his marriage, and a sex addicted FBI agent, join the California Highway Patrol, in order to find the undercover agents causing crime under their noses. Spoiler alert: it’s the most obvious casting.

            Does it look bad to you? Well, it should, because it sucks…it sucks really badly. I get this film may be trying to cash in on the success of the “21 Jump Street” film franchise, taking a cheesy show and making a big budget comedy out of it, but here’s the thing: “21 & 22 Jump Street” were both directed by Phil Lord and Chris Miller, two of the funniest film makers working today. “Chips,” however, was directed/written/produced by the star, Dax Shepard, who is nowhere near the level of skill that Lord and Miller are at, or even 30%.

I mean, sure I’ll admit I laughed about…five times in this movie, but they were so spread out and far between that it doesn’t get a pass from me. It’s an action comedy, yet it lacks in both. Hell, the only funny and exciting moment that I had with the movie was seeing Justin Chatwin getting his head sliced off in the film. There were also some really bad edits that I noticed, where the cut was either too early or too late, especially when you have audio that doesn’t feel matched right. And as someone who took an editing class just last fall, it just made me angry how poorly cobbled together this film felt.

            Part of what doesn’t work is that these characters aren’t likable. Hell, the only actor who seems to be trying to make this work is Vincent D’Onofrio as the villain. Even in some of the lousiest of films, D’Onofrio always manages to bring his A-game, especially when it comes to villains. However, that’s about the best thing that I can say about this film’s casting. Everyone one else on the other hand…oh boy. Michael Pena and Dax Shepard are two characters that don’t mesh well together. Pena plays the guy trying to do the real work but is a sex addict, and Shepard plays the douchey BMX expert who’s trying to fix his marriage. They both have a pro-con setting to them, but it doesn’t flow right. These two have such horrible chemistry together on screen, that you just end up hating both of them equally and begin rooting for the villain to flat out ax these two off. As for the supporting cast, Rosa Salazar, Jane Kaczmarek, Adam Brody, Kristen Bell, Maya Rudolph, Jessica McNamee, and Ben Falcone are all wasted. Hell, the film even features a cameo from Mae Whitman, who hosts a children’s fair and had one of the only good lines in the movie! For you to waste Mae Whitman, one of the most talented young actresses of the past two decades, that’s a major fuck you!

            Overall, I do not recommend “CHiPs.” This film was just a stupid, stupid…STUPID piece of shit. Most of the jokes are vulgar in the worst possible way, the action is sub-par at best, the main characters are annoying, the editing is terrible, and it’s just not worth your time. Even after getting a free pass for this movie, I felt cheated.

Rating: 2/10

Saban's Power Rangers

            What do you get when you take martial arts action, kaiju monsters, a monster of the week scenario, mecha anime, and put it all into a teenage sitcom? You get “Might Morphin Power Rangers.” Based on the Japanese show, “Super Sentai,” and produced by Saban Entertainment internationally, the show was about a group of teenagers with attitude, who are chosen to fight against the evil forces of the universe by carrying the mantle of the Power Rangers. Much like how “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles” was a silly but successful concept, “Power Rangers” had the same effect on the next generation of young television viewers. Now, to be honest, I was never really much into the franchise, but I did grow up under siblings who were huge fans from when it started, so I was at least familiar with it to an extent.

            Of course, with every phenomenon, Hollywood MUST MAKE MONEY FROM IT! And so we received two “Power Rangers” movies in the 90’s, and a new reboot in today’s modern world. When trailers popped up, it made it look like it was going to be much of the same schlock we got from Michael Bay’s “Transformers” series…however, I can safely say, that is not the case.

            In this retelling of the original Ranger stories, we follow five teenagers living in Angel Grove, who find five coins hidden in the side of a canyon. They soon discover that these coins have given them super strength and agility, and that they must now carry on the mantle of the Power Rangers. With the guidance of Zordon and Alpha 5, they must learn how to harness their new abilities to take on the evil Rita Repulsa, before she resurrects her monster, Goldar.

            “Saban’s Power Rangers” gives me exactly what I wanted this movie to be. Unlike most movie reboots of TV shows, where they try to be serious or be failed comedies, Dean Israelite manages to showcase a proper balance of a serious tone and a sense of humor that feels in place with the film. It’s cheesy, like the show, but it’s the fun kind of cheese, and I just had a big smile on my face the whole way through. And as somebody who didn’t have that much of a connection to the show, that’s saying a lot.

            Now what makes this film work are two major things that the “Transformers” movies fail to do: proper action and characters that you grow attached to. With “Transformers,” there are several times when you look at these giant robots, and they feel weightless, so it doesn’t suck you into the action, and other times you can’t even tell what the hell is going on, with the shaky camera work that gives you a headache. “Power Rangers,” while it has some shaky cam, you can still tell what is happening on screen, and you still get a sense of weight with what’s on screen, as opposed to watching some cheap video game cutscene. The hits look, sound, and feel genuine, and you feel the concern when you see these character get hurt.

            This brings us to the characters. As for our five actors playing the Rangers, I thought they did pretty well with what they were given. Sure, they may not all be 100% accurate to the original cast of Rangers, but I still found them to be good characters to follow. Darce Montgomery as Jason the Red Ranger and Naomi Scott as Kimberly the Pink Ranger were good leads; RJ Cyler as Billy the Blue Ranger and Ludi Lin as Zack the Black Ranger were hilarious; and Becky G as Trini the Yellow Ranger was interesting and mysterious. I also welcomed the kind of diversity that they brought to the Rangers that didn’t feel forced in your face and distracting. It felt in tune with what the film was going for, and focused mainly on one major thing: these characters and their interactions with one another.

            When it comes to Alpha 5 and Zordon, Bill Hader and Bryan Cranston were great. Even if they were simply doing voiceover, you feel the bond that these two share between each other. You feel that they’ve had a strong bond for a long time, and both actors bring that out very nicely. Hell, I’ll even admit that Bill Hader made Alpha 5 one of the best characters in the movie, because he adds his signature comedic flare to it. Richard Horvitz would be proud, to say the least. Also, interesting to see Bryan Cranston come full circle with his career, considering one of his first ever jobs was working on the original series voicing some of the putties, and is now playing Zordon. I also liked the idea of having Zordon being a former Ranger, because it adds a stronger connection and reasoning as to why he would want the Rangers to continue on.

            However, the most entertaining part of the movie was Elizabeth Banks as Rita Repulsa. Honestly, I don’t know how there’s still scenery left after her scenes, because she chews it constantly. She just goes all out with this role and has fun with it, and you can tell by the look in her eyes. She’s creepy, she’s dangerous, and she’s just so entertaining to watch. I liked the decision of making her the former Green Ranger, as opposed to the random alien overlord, mostly because it makes her more of a threat to the new Ranger team, knowing their history and everything and adding a darker sense to the character. They even manage to explain one of the biggest plot holes of the show: why did Rita always attack Angel Grove? Well, this movie gives a good reason for it, but I won’t spoil it.

            Is there anything that I didn’t like about the movie? Well, it is a flawed script where some lines felt out of place, and there were some character arcs that weren’t as strong as others, especially with Zack’s arc. There’s also a big joke in the story that, while it does feel in tone with the story, it still feels very stupid. Again, no spoilers, but just saying. I also thought the way the Megazord transformed was pretty lazy, because it doesn’t indicate how it forms together and chooses to form behind a big wall of fire. Lastly, I kind of wished the fight with the Megazord was a bit longer, but that’s just me.

            Aside from that, "Saban's Power Rangers" was cheesy, but it's the good kind of cheese. If you’re a fan of “Power Rangers” since the “Mighty Morphin” era, you’re going to have a good time. Even if you’re not a fan, I guarantee you’re still going to enjoy it as a fun popcorn flick. And with plans for an upcoming sequel, I guarantee you I’ll be looking forward to it.

Rating: 8/10

KONG: Skull Island

            With the success of Legendary Pictures’ take on “Godzilla,” it would make sense that the studio would attempt to bring a new take on a classic giant monster to life. Maybe more creatures in the “Godzilla” universe, or…maybe it could try an attempt to resurrect another giant monster we all know. Like say…KING KONG MAYBE?!

            Yes, people, Legendary Pictures set out to bring forth King Kong onto the big screen again, over a decade after Peter Jackson’s 2005 epic remake. However, instead of redoing the same story we always do with King Kong, we decide to go into full on B-movie territory and have fun with this creature, so we can build up to “King Kong vs. Godzilla.”

            At the tail-end of the Vietnam War, a group of scientists and a squadron of soldiers are sent to investigate the uncharted territory known as Skull Island. What they find there is an island full of oversized monsters and their guardian, Kong. After the team separates, we now have one side that wants to take the big ape down, and another side that believes there’s more to this than they think.

            Now, the question is, did I like the movie? Well…look, I know this film was supposed to be a B-movie, so perfection was not on its mind, but I still felt the film was a bit underwhelming. Don’t get me wrong, I like the film fine, but I just wished that it was a bit more of the fun blockbuster I was hoping it’d be from what we saw in the trailers. Or if they were going to do things a little more serious, you could have gone completely in the tonal direction of the previous “Godzilla” movie.

            I know the film is supposed to go for the whole classic B-movie monster adventure flick, so not everything is going to be top notch and you want to save the monster scenes sparingly, but I can’t really have fun with it, if I’m not enjoying the characters. While it does have an all-star cast attached to it,  powerhouse character actors like Tom Hiddleston, Brie Larson, that…kid from “Me and Earl and the Dying Girl,” and Toby Kebbel, they play such generic stereotypes in such a flimsy script that it doesn’t give them much to play around. For instance, Toby Kebbel’s character is on his own, and he witnesses Kong and the skullcrawlers before they’re introduced into the movie, but he’s killed off so it makes you ask, what was the point of him being there. Tom Hiddleston’s character is said to be this ultimate badass tracker, but with how bland his performance is, you could have easily cast it with someone else like Shia Labouf or any of the expendable cast members from “The Walking Dead,” and it wouldn’t have made a lick of difference. Same with Brie Larson, who plays this Vietnam War photographer…and that’s it. Come on, you’ve got an Oscar winning actress in your hands, and you don’t do anything with her?!

            Despite this, there are three actors that make the film enjoyable. Two of them are John Goodman and Samuel L. Jackson. These two are such powerhouse actors that whenever they pop up on screen, they just dominate the scene, and when they’re both in a scene going back and forth with one another, between escaping to prove monsters exist and one wanting to stay and fight the monster to the bitter end, it really makes for some interesting scene work. And the third actor that makes the film enjoyable is John C Reilly, who plays a WWII pilot who crashed on Skull Island and had been stuck there since. Considering he appears when Hiddleston and Larson’s team show up, he adds a good balance of enjoyment to be had with each team now, even if it only comes from one or two people. May not be much, but I’ll take what I can get.

            The film is also incredible to look at. It has the feel of a classic old Vietnam film, like “Apocalypse Now!” Hell, people have been dubbing the film “Apocalypse Kong,” and fittingly so. I especially love the shots when Kong is on screen, where he stands in front of the setting sun or full moon and he’s silhouetted, or when he’s towering over someone and you’re looking through that person’s POV, it looks incredible. They really knew how to make Kong look like a massive force of nature to be feared. Some of the monsters are also pretty cool...although, much like how the MUTO looked like a mix between Mothra and the Cloverfield monster, the skullcrawlers look like a mix between the creepers from “Code Lyoko” and the skull-monkeys from “The Neverhood” series, so it loses points of originality. But at least Kong has more screentime than Godzilla did.

            Overall, is “Kong: Skull Island” a film worth seeing? Yeah, but I wouldn’t recommend paying full price for it. It’s worth renting, especially since it does establish Kong in the Godzilla universe by the end, but unless you want to feel the full emphasis of Kong on the biggest screen you can find, I’d say see it at a low matinee. It’s disappointing to say the least.

Rating 6/10