Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice

With the success of the Marvel Cinematic Universe conquering the box office, Warner Bros. and DC Comics have struggled to try and keep up with the properties that they are in possession of right now. So far, their most successful property has been the Batman franchise, but with Christopher Nolan’s “Dark Knight Trilogy” finished, the freedom to use Batman with the Justice League is calling to us. And the film that starts out the DC Extended Universe is “Man of Steel.”

I’ve talked about my thoughts on “Man of Steel” back when it was first released, and I hold true to what I say about it. I thought how they handled Superman’s origin story was pretty good, the action scenes were really cool, and I found it to be an overall satisfying movie. Of course, it’s now become the film that has split DC fans to new extremes, especially with the controversy that is all around the film. Look, I’m not here to tell people which side is wrong and which side is right. My job is to share my feelings toward the movies, that’s it. If you didn’t like the film, I’m not going to harass you and whine about you disagreeing with me, because I’m not a dick.

For the follow-up film in the DC Extended Universe, Warner Bros. decided that the next film to bring to the table would be “Batman Vs. Superman.” This was a project that hadn’t really left the ground for decades. The possibilities were growing more, ever since 1989, and now the time had come to really make that dream a reality. And despite me loving “Man of Steel,” I wasn’t really that hyped about the film. Even before casting was made or any screenwriters were brought about, I just didn’t seem to feel that excited about it coming out. Hell, I could say that about ANY movie that’s coming out. Regardless of what people had to say, good or bad, my expectations were about the same.

So after attending the Thursday night screening (not 3D or IMAX), what did I think of one of the most anticipated films of all time? Well, my lovely people, for a film that I had little-to-no interest with, “Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice” was at the very least a satisfying movie.

Now that doesn’t mean the film is great, because there are a lot of flaws that did bother me. For one, the dream sequences were annoying and didn’t add much to the film. I kind of get where they were going with it, trying to make it feel like Batman is afraid of Superman, but they just didn’t work. There’s also another dream sequence involving the Flash, which again could have been cut out of the film. This brings me to another problem I have with the film, the Justice League cameos. I mean, Wonder Woman’s role in the film is fine, and doesn’t bother me that much, but the rest is so obviously shoehorned in. It would have been nice to keep them as subtle little hints, but they practically show almost all the upcoming members that were announced. It’s as if the film is trying to scream at you “JUSTICE LEAGUE IS COMING! JUSTICE LEAGUE IS COMING!” I don’t blame screenwriter, Chris Terrio, for this, because he was brought aboard to fix up this script as much as possible, so I don’t even want to know what the film would have been like if he wasn’t called in to help. The pacing also felt a bit slow in parts, with some scenes going nowhere and me missing nothing when it was done after using the restroom. And as for the battle between the son of Krypton and the Bat of Gotham, it felt pretty short. I mean, when it was happening, it was awesome, but I wanted it to last a little bit longer. I mean, maybe there’s more of the fight in the director’s cut, but that’s another story to talk about.

So with all the bad that I had to say about this film, there is still some good in it, starting with the cast. Henry Cavill gives another great performance as Superman, improving on what he learned from “Man of Steel,” and applying it to this film. Even with the abilities of a God, he’s still somebody who eventually makes mistakes, especially when it comes to his loved ones being targets. To me, this is what makes Superman more relatable, is that he’s still as flawed as anyone else would be. He isn’t always going to have the best option, especially when his best option doesn’t work. Cavill is a great actor, and he’s a great Superman. Now to talk about the most controversial casting of the film: Ben Affleck as Bruce Wayne/Batman. This is the casting that almost everybody was pissed off about for two reasons: 1) The interview with Josh Brolin and how he was almost picked for the role. 2) Ben Affleck’s portrayal as Daredevil. But here’s the thing people seem to forget: Ben Affleck is a smart guy. He’s learned from his mistakes in the early millennium, and how he managed to pull himself out of that gutter of infamy is proof of that. Besides, imagine if he had the offer to play Batman immediately after the success of Daredevil. Would he have accepted it then? No, because he wouldn’t do that until he knew for sure his career was back in the green, before giving the superhero thing another try. And with this film, it really paid off. Not only did Affleck really sell it in terms of bulking up, but his portrayal of the character was done really damn well. The bachelor, the genius, the corrupted, the Batman himself. To all those “Dark Knight” fanboys out there, take it with a grain of salt, because Ben Affleck is easily the 2nd best live action Batman (Keaton will always be #1).

While Gal Gadot wouldn’t be my first choice to play Diana Prince/Wonder Woman, I have to admit she did pretty damn well with what she was given. Would she have done better if she was given more screen time to develop, especially in her own movie? Yes. But unlike the other distracting Justice League easter eggs, this one managed to fit into the story decently. Plus, seeing Wonder Woman on the big screen for the first time was a very satisfying treat. Then we have Jesse Eisenberg as Lex Luthor Jr. Some people were a little offhanded by his performance in the trailers, which I understand. Originally, Eisenberg auditioned to play the Riddler in the movie, but since the character was cut from the film, they decided to cast him as Superman’s arch rival. The story arc involving Luthor is pretty good, especially with how he gets Batman and Superman to fight. Still would have preferred Bryan Cranston, but whatever. Now much like everybody else, I thought Doomsday was just going to be shoehorned in at the very last minute, but not quite. Sure, he comes in at the end to fight off the World’s Finest, but at least the film does build up to his creation with Luthor getting Zod’s remains in the first act.

If there’s one thing that really worked out well, it was the action scenes. They’re entertaining, nicely shot, and they manage to keep the tension going as steady as possible. While I’m not that much of a Zack Snyder fan, I do give him credit for having a keen eye for action scenes. Not the best, but still pretty good.

Now could the film be better if it was reworked? ABSOLUTELY. If it had cut out all of the references to the Justice League, the dream sequences, and unnecessary cameos, it would have been less crowded. If it wanted to still be a two-and-a-half hour movie, that’s fine, as long as they focused more on the story they’re trying to work with. And yes, I know there's a 3-hour long R rated cut of the movie coming out on blu-ray, but is that really going to solve the problems I’ve stated? No.

Overall, this film already has a lot of people with some very mixed feelings. Some love it, other hate it, and several don’t know what to conclude on. With every great thing it does, it also has something equally questioning. From where I stand, as I’m writing this, I thought it was alright. Not great, not terrible, just alright. Is the film worth seeing in theaters? Yes. Would I buy it on blu-ray when it comes out? Probably not. But for what holds for the future of the DC Extended Universe, we’ll just have to wait and see.

Rating: 6/10

Zootopia

            Disney Animation Studios is giving us two films this year, one coming in November, and another brought to us fairly recently. Seems fitting, since they had Pixar give out two films last year, as a way to play catch up. So let’s not waste any more time and talk about “Zootopia.”

            The film tells of Judy Hopps, a rabbit who dreams of working on the police force of Zootopia, despite being a prey species. As she acquires the job, she takes on the task of searching for one of fourteen missing predators, with the help of a hustler fox named Nick Wilde.

            Not only is “Zootopdia” good, it’s also a really smart. It isn’t just another kids film that tries to appeal to a specific audience, it's also a film that tackles a lot of issues that have gone on in our own society, especially with recent events. While it is mostly a film about following your dreams and never giving up so easily, the themes of political corruption, sexism, racism, stereotyping, and prejudice are cleverly showcased in a way that feels natural to the story, similar to how “Wreck-It Ralph” did it. Kudos to the team of writers the film had, because this is one of the best written scripts I’ve seen in a while.

            As for the animation, it delivers on being excellent. It’s fast paced, colorful, comforting, detailed, and always has one or two jokes that you may miss in one scene that you’ll notice a second time. Bryon Howard and Rich Moore really put their direction skills to the test and crafted one of the finest modern day animated films of the past few years. It’s always nice when you have two directors in animation to have a nice collaborative mindset.

            And with every great buddy cop film, it’s nice to have two foils that you grow attached to. Judy and Nick have such good chemistry with one another, with Nick’s smart aleck attitude contrasting against Judy’s goody-two-shoes attitude, learning from their antics and applying it to their style throughout. They both were taunted for not being accepted for what they wanted to be, going on different paths of whether to accept reality or fight against stereotyping, showing that they may have more in common than what you may think. I have to give props to Ginnifer Goodwin and Jason Bateman for voicing these characteristics so well in the film. Other characters like Idris Elba as the buffalo chief of police, J.K. Simmons as the lion mayor, Jenny Slate as his assistant sheep, Alan Tudyk as a weasel, an appearance by Shakira as a Gazelle pop-star, John DiMaggio as an ice cream parlor elephant, Maurice LaMarche as an arctic shrew, and several other characters are all very enjoyable as well.

            With what I was expecting of “Zootopia,” I got so much more out of it, and it stands as one of my favorite films of the year, the more I think about it. Everything about it just hit the right spots, and it’s a worthy addition to Disney’s Neo-Renaissance Era. I highly recommend you see it.

Rating: 10/10

Gods of Egypt

In 1994, director Alex Proyas gave us the neo-noir fantasy film, “The Crow.” It was a film that shows us a man who had everything taken from him, even his love, and come back from the dead to take his revenge on the ones responsible. Despite it mostly being remembered for the tragic passing of the film’s star, Brandon Lee, the film has such a very dark and intense style to it, similar to that of Tim Burton’s Batman films that came before. Hell, I’d say it even rivals up with them.

Despite Proyas having such a creative vision with “The Crow,” he’s never been able to recapture that same sense of greatness into any of his other films. Sure, “Dark City” was good, but it wasn’t anything special. And with his newest film, “Gods of Egypt,” I wasn’t expecting much to come of that either, except a decent popcorn film…I didn’t even get that.

“Gods of Egypt” tells of a world where the gods live among the mortals, and its king, Osiris is about to crown his son, Horus, as the next ruler. However, his jealous brother, Set, kills Osiris and takes Horus’s eyes, as the first of gods he hunts down to claim absolute power. After one of the eyes is returned to Horus, by a thief named Bek, the two now must defeat Set and restore balance to the lands.

The first problem I have about the film is that it is SO BORING. This film drags so damn much, with scenes that either go on too long or don’t add anything to the film at all, it felt longer than “Tranformers 4.” That’s how boring it, because nothing exciting happens. All those action scenes that are showcased in the trailer, they’re not as entertaining in the actual movie. They’re just cobbled messes of CGI and green-screen that almost reach “Legend of Hercules” levels of bad. But, at least that film had some kind of entertainment value to it, with how bad it was.

It also doesn’t help when even the cast doesn’t feel enthusiastic about it. Brenton Thwaites as Bek was obviously phoning it in, and his character trait is that he’s just an Aladdin knockoff. I’m not even joking: he’s a thief, a smart-ass, skilled and light on his feet, and has boyish charms that….he’s fucking Aladdin! Nikolaj Coster-Waldau, who you may know as Jaimie Lannister from “Game of Thrones,” plays Horus, and his trait is the Moses archetype. Someone with bountiful perks that learns to care for those less fortunate than him, and learns a valuable lesson about how he treats others…how motivating. Gerard Butler plays Set, a jealous brother that was spoiled about Daddy never picking him as the favorite, so he goes all bad and stuff…people, I’m trying to grab at whatever I can get.

This film had been under a lot of controversy for casting white actors as Egyptians, but much like “Pan,” it wouldn’t have mattered if the casting was correct or not, because of how terrible the script is. Every character in just about every scene has a one-liner said, and all of them are incredibly distracting. Seriously, not a single character in this movie can go one scene without making some stupid remark, to where it went from annoying to pure aggravation. Granted, it’s not as bad as the douchebag scout from “Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse,” but it’s still pretty bad.

I would have more to talk about, but with how little this movie cares about itself, it doesn’t deserve anymore of my efforts. Overall, “Gods of Egypt” is a tremendous piece of shit and is so far the worst film I’ve seen this year. The effects and action aren’t exciting, the characters are boring and stock, and the writing is piss-poor at best. Expect me to talk about this film again when I talk about my Worst of 2016.

Rating: 1/10

Zoolander 2

When it comes to comedic actors, Ben Stiller is a bit of a wild card. As an actor, it’s hard to expect whether or not he’ll be in a film that’s good. Sometimes he’ll be in something like “Dodgeball” or “Night at the Museum,” and sometimes he’ll be in stuff like “The Watch” or “The Heartbreak Kid.” But the projects that have always been consistently good have been his works as a director. Films such as “Tropic Thunder” and “The Cable Guy” have turned out relatively successful, whether they’d be Oscar nominated works or cult classics, there’s always a special place for them. Hell, his version of “The Secret Life of Walter Mitty” barely escaped being on my Best of 2013 list, being a very touching dramedy. But whenever people think of Ben Stiller’s directed work, the film that everyone instantly thinks of is “Zoolander.”

The 2001 comedy was about male supermodel, Derek Zoolander, who was on top of the fashion world, until his winning streak was beaten by his rival, Hansel. And because Derek is a numbskull, the evil Mugatu plans to use him as his tool to hypnotize into murdering the Malaysian prime minister, to retain child labor in the country.

While the original film wasn’t that big of a hit back then, it developed a massive cult following over the years. There isn’t a moment that hasn’t already been quoted more than once, it gave off a nice low budget feel to it, and I’m certain everybody has given their own blue steel. With how popular the film had become after so many years, it’s become the role we all identify Ben Stiller with, and I think even he knows that.

As the popularity of “Zoolander” grew, speculations on whether they’d make a sequel in the future. On the plus side, it went into production after “The Secret Life of Walter Mitty” was released. On the down side…the film was a complete waste. I’m not kidding when I say “Zoolander 2” is the year’s first major disappointment. Hell, after I saw this movie opening day, I immediately went to go see “Deadpool” to cheer myself up. Yeah, I was that upset.

What’s my major problem with this movie? It’s not funny. Hell, it took me until Billy Zane showed up for the first time before I got a decent chuckle…which was about 10 minutes into the movie. The jokes that they throw at the audience tend to go so far south from either poor execution or it dragging on too long. Or maybe it’s both, and the main thing we’re supposed to laugh at is that their references to the first movie or that the next cameo they throw to make audiences go “Oh hey, it’s that famous person.” Sure, the first movie had tons of cameos, but they never tried to draw the focus away from the story. Here, it’s the exact opposite: the cameos are unfunny and distract from the story. The biggest offenders of this were with Fred Armisen and Benedict Cumberbatch. Armisen plays this frightening CGI child, and the effect looks worse than when they youthanized Mike Myers in "The Love Guru." Yeah, that bad. Plus, the main joke is that he's playing an 11-year old boy...and??? Where's the punchline? In the words of T.J. Miller, “you are haunting.” As for Benedict Cumberbatch, he plays this new transgender model that only appears for like three minutes, then is never mentioned again…seriously? That’s it? You had so much potential with this idea, and you just waste it on jokes about what he/she identifies as? That’s pathetic!

Speaking of which, the story is absolute garbage and isn’t interesting in the slightest. Yeah, Derek Zoolander and Hansel join forces with secret services, so the film is now an Austin Powers wannabe. What’s the goal here? Help the agency, all the while Derek tries to gain custody of his son back, after his wife was killed by the school he built at the end of the first film, because it was made out of faulty construction products. Yeah, they pull the “love interest isn’t there anymore” cliché, something that almost every comedy sequel does, and I’m fucking sick of that. But instead of it being a situation of where the actress couldn’t reprise her role or declined, Christine Taylor does appear in the film as a ghost, which is even worse. What was the purpose? Taylor as Matilda in the first film was such an enjoyable character, and the chemistry that she had with Derek was really fun to watch, especially since the two are married in real life, yet she gets replaced with Penelope Cruz in skin-tight leather? Is there something I’m not aware of?

With the main cast, I felt really bad for them in this film, because they're obviously trying their best. Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson still have good chemistry with one another, and it does feel like they’re having fun with it…but with how this script is written, it just feels really awkward and uncomfortable, especially when they work off of other people. The scenes with Derek and his son? Not funny. The romance subplot with Derek and Valentina? Unnecessary. The scenes with Hansel and his orgy pack? Not that memorable (except for Keifer Sutherland). That obvious subplot about Hansel and his father? Incredibly obvious. Hell, not even Will Ferrell as Mugatu was funny. Even though he plays a big part in the film, he feels incredibly forced.

Overall, “Zoolander 2” was a major disappointment. I hate to admit it, but I just felt so empty watching this. Aside from a couple chuckles that I got, and Ben and Owen trying their best with what they have, it’s just another sequel that tries too hard to be like the first film…but man, was this a fucking misfire. And from the looks of it, there’s a strong chance this will end up on my worst of the year list come this winter.

Rating: 2/10