Battleship

Hasbro is a company that's been a house-hold name for about thirty years at this point. It's had many toy franchises from "My Little Pony" to "G.I. Joe" and the evermore popular, "Transformers". Hasbro has had ways of getting it's franchises on either the big screen or the little screen, and have had either hit or miss chances. In the past five years, the ones that have been tolerable to deal on film, have been "G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra" and two out of three "Transformers" movies directed by Michael Bay. But none of the examples I've brought up are what today's subject is...which is also the DUMBEST idea I've seen in years. "Battleship: The Movie".

Now, let's go over the story, or lack of, if there is one. Alex Hopper is an alcoholic wreck, who on the day of his 25th birthday, gets in serious trouble with his brother. As punishment, he's then signed up to join him in the navy, while dating the Admiral's daughter, Sam. But during the Naval War Games, they find a crashed towering material, that are crashed alien ships that have made certain transmission with NASA satellite's making contact them. Now with the aliens trapping them in a barrier, it's up to Alex and anyone else by his side to take down the seemingly unstoppable forces and save the world.

Now let me tell you the good stuff I liked in this film. First off, the CGI looked pretty good. Even for something like "Battleship," it's got amazing special effects. When you see the aliens, their ships, and the action scenes, it looks really impressive. As for the plot of the film, I actually found it to be amusing enough. Don't get me wrong, I found it stupid as all, but I didn't expect anything better from a film based on a board game. Another main thing that was good, was Liam Neeson. I can't help it, he's just one of my favorite actors, and has shown to give off a good performance no matter how bad the film is, with the exception of "The Haunting". Taylor Keitch as Alex, I'll admit was surprisingly good. Granted, he gives almost the same performance as he did in "John Carter," but not as bad. In fact, in the begining of the film, he actually made me laugh pretty hard. Rihanna was...okay, to say the least. She didn't leave much of an impression on me, but at least she wasn't a complete waste.

But despite what was good about the film, I did have a few gripes about the film. Going back to Liam Neeson, I was simply aggravated that they underused him. I mean, with him being outside the barrier, HE BARELY HAD ANYTHING TO DO! Another thing that bothered me, were some of the characters. I just grew tired of over half of them, so much so, where I'm not even going to bother mentioning why. Yes, I was that bored with them. It was then, I started to feel like the movie's corniness was starting to fade. But there was one thing that actually kept it going well. There's a handicapped war hero in the film...and what he does in the third act of the film was simply hilarious! That moment in the film just saved it.

Overall, "Battleship" is just a dumb, lazy, clunky, loud, mess of a film...but I loved it! I was expecting nothing more than a cheesey action film at sea, and I got what I wanted. Some more, some less, but it was still a fun movie. And I'll admit, it's at least better than the first two "Transformers" movies, ESPECIALLY "Revenge of the Fallen."...*shutters*...

Rating: 5/10